What Are You Thinking

A few months ago in the North Carolina Raleigh Mission, we were blessed to hear from Elder W. Craig Zwick. Last General Conference we were able to hear from him again in a talk titled What Are You Thinking?. The story he told about his young family helps illuminate our knowledge on forgiveness and understanding.

Forty-one years ago I climbed into the driver’s seat of an 18-wheel semitruck with my beautiful wife, Jan, and our infant son, Scotty. We were taking a heavy load of construction materials across several states. In those days there were no seat-belt restrictions or infant car seats. My wife held our precious son in her arms. Her comment “We sure are high off the ground” should have given me a clue about her feelings of apprehension.
As we made our descent over historic Donner Pass, a steep section of highway, the cab of the semi suddenly and unexpectedly filled with thick smoke. It was difficult to see, and we could hardly breathe.
With a heavy rig, brakes alone are not enough to rapidly decrease speed. Using the engine brakes and gearing down, I frantically attempted to stop.
Just as I was pulling to the side of the road, but before we had come to a full stop, my wife opened the door of the cab and jumped out with our baby in her arms. I watched helplessly as they tumbled in the dirt.
As soon as I had the semi stopped, I bolted from the smoking cab. With adrenaline pumping, I ran through the rocks and weeds and held them in my arms. Jan’s forearms and elbows were battered and bleeding, but thankfully she and our son were both breathing. I just held them close as the dust settled there on the side of the highway.
As my heartbeat normalized and I caught my breath, I blurted out, “What in the world were you thinking? Do you know how dangerous that was? You could have been killed!”
She looked back at me, with tears running down her smoke-smudged cheeks, and said something that pierced my heart and still rings in my ears: “I was just trying to save our son.”
I realized in that moment she thought the engine was on fire, fearing the truck would explode and we would die. I, however, knew it was an electrical failure—hazardous but not fatal. I looked at my precious wife, softly rubbing the head of our infant son, and wondered what kind of woman would do something so courageous.
This situation could have been as emotionally hazardous as our literal engine failure. Gratefully, after enduring the silent treatment for a reasonable amount of time, each of us believing the other person was at fault, we finally expressed the emotions that were churning beneath our heated outbursts. Shared feelings of love and fear for the other’s safety kept the hazardous incident from proving fatal to our cherished marriage.

How often in our lives do we find ourselves in arguments fueled by misunderstanding? With hundreds and hundreds of different cultures all around the world it is easy to see why there is so much contention. We read from the writings of Paul "Let no corrupt communication proceed out of your mouth, but that which is good to the use of edifying, that it may minister grace unto the hearers." If we all make a conscious effort to understand where one another is coming from, imagine where the world would be.

New Teacher

The experiences I have had thus far on my mission truly humble me.

This week I would like to talk about Daniel, one of the Haitian investigators Elder Gardner and I get to work with. Daniel lives at the end of a dead end street here in Lumberton, NC. On any given trip down Daniel's street chances are you would see many more Haitian refugees outside their homes talking and laughing. Daniel stands at roughly 6 foot 4 inches I would guess and always wears a smile ear to ear. The rest of his family still lives back in Haiti but he hopes to have them with him soon.

This past week two areas in Lumberton were consolidated leaving me with many investigators that other missionaries had been working with, most of which are Haitian. This process of meeting these new people is a normal thing in missionary work and usually comes with quite a bit of work. The tendency is that most investigators take some time to get used to the new missionary and their might even be some apprehension at first. To my surprise this was not the case at all with Daniel and many others.

It was my first day working with Elder Gardner and I was nervous because I hadn't learned much Creole yet. We drove down Daniel's street and pulled up to his house. Moments after we knocked on his door it swung open, he looked at me with his big smile and said, "NEW TEACHER!" He invited us in and smiled as he listened to the message we shared that day. Daniel showed so much love for me.

From house to house the love of these humble people has been the same. Though their earthly possessions are few, it always seems like they are trying to give you everything they have. I have never seen a happier group of people in my life. I am excited for the many more adventures to come!

Mother's Day

Many times on my mission my companion and I have been invited over to families homes for dinner. I love the opportunity we have to meet with all of these people. Not too long ago, we had the opportunity to go over to yet another families home.

We all sat together and talked as usual and enjoyed the evening. As missionaries, at the end of the dinner we usually share a brief spiritual message to show our gratitude to those who were kind enough to let us in. When we were sharing a message about prayer the mother just broke down in tears. Choking on her tears, she told us how her son (who was gone that night) hadn't talked to her all weekend and wouldn't eat. She was so worried about her son. You could see the distress and love in her eyes. We promised her that all would be well.

Fast forward to that night I did a lot of contemplating. I had never really come to see a mother's love in that light until that evening. What makes the bond between a mother and her child so deep? The divine love that mothers have is no doubt inspired.

By divine design, fathers are to preside over their families in love and righteousness and are responsible to provide the necessities of life and protection for their families. Mothers are primarily responsible for the nurture of their children. In these sacred responsibilities, fathers and mothers are obligated to help one another as equal partners. Disability, death, or other circumstances may necessitate individual adaptation. Extended families should lend support when needed. -The Family a Proclamation to the World

It made me look back on my life and realize how much my mother has always loved me. My heart breaks to know that at one time or another, just like the mother we talked to, my mom probably shed a tear or two worrying about me. My mom has always been patient with my siblings for all my life. I am thankful that God has given me such a great family and the example that my parents have set for me!

Happy Mothers Day!
(AKA Missionaries get to talk to their family day)